When I was living in the Algarve, Portugal I had the opportunity of going on a Vision Quest. We were taken to a rugged area in the vicinity of Loulé and each of us set off in the direction that called to us. Even though we were physically quite close to each other, because of all the large rocks in the region it felt like we were completely alone.
I sat down quietly and waited for my message. After some time a bee flew past and alighted on a nearby flower. I watched this bee intently while it was going about its business and came to realise that it never alighted on a dead flower – only on the live ones. I got to thinking about human behaviour and came to the conclusion that we could learn a lot from bees.
How often do we hold onto dead relationships, jobs and situations – always hoping that they will change, when in fact we should be thanking them for the learning, letting go and walking away – dashing off to embrace new relationships and learning.
How much pain do we cause ourselves through this process of holding on, and to what advantage? Holding onto the past not only keeps us in a painful state, but it stunts our growth – both physically and spiritually.
I have stopped sending Christmas cards. This has always been a December ritual, though for the past few years it hasn’t really resonated with me at all. However, this year every fibre of my being rebelled against this habit of mine! I had this heightened sense of dread – which seemed excessive for something as trivial as writing cards, but was really about something much deeper going on in my psyche. The truth is that some of the people I sent cards to I don’t even know anymore. It’s a once a year friendship – habit forming on both sides I would think. Fundamentally, dead relationships!
Instead, I phoned a few friends on Christmas Day and they were both delighted and surprised to hear from me. I will be contacting others in January and suggesting that we reignite our friendships – have conversations throughout the year, keeping up on what is happening in each others lives. Our friendships will either change and grow into something new, or fade away if we find that we no longer have anything in common, but at least there will be active movement, rather than holding onto the past, which is long gone and stagnant.
This decision has left me feeling lighter and freer – I have dispensed with an action which was tethering me to having to do a certain thing at a certain time. I don’t know about you, but I am craving freedom of action and expression more and more these days – in line with the planetary changes which are in full swing. These are interesting times indeed!
I wish you all a very happy letting go period and may all the flowers that you land on be live ones!
Have you let go of anything recently which had become an uncomfortable habit?
Sue is the Founder of Soulfully Connecting. The idea behind Soulfully Connecting is to demonstrate that there are other ways of living which can heal the earth, the animal kingdom and ourselves. She is passionate about people having freedom of choice, which is only possible when they know about all the options.